Tuesday, 12 April 2016
Thursday, 17 March 2016
Thursday, 10 March 2016
Earthquake and Rapture Revelation
I was in a church where I used to go and worship. The pastor at the pulpit was crying for forgiveness and encouraging the congregation to pray for mercy and forgiveness that the end-time is near and it is now! The lady was in tears and the whole room was filled with groaning and prayers. All of a sudden, the building we were in tilted to one side. and we all fell to the side. I looked out through the window and noticed that the ground was cracking open. people were running back and forth for safety. I was in tears and could not cope. I heard voices cry; 'its too late', 'God have mercy', Lord please'.
My heart could no longer take this revelation so I got up!
Jesus is coming back sooner than we expect. Be prepared because few minutes away from now may be too late. Going to church would not take you to heaven! Being a chorister, preacher, leader or taking up roles at church will not take you to heaven. Come to Jesus for Him to build a great relationship with you now before it is too late.
Thursday, 3 March 2016
MY STORY: MASTURBATION (part 3)
As I prayed, i felt comfort, one that i've never felt before. I could not comprehend it!
"How is it that i just sinned and God is so close to me, comforting me?!" I wondered.
The spirit within me led me to listen to Joyce Meyer and i learnt to 'lay my burdens at His feet'
I slept off as I listened to the sermon full of peace and rest of mind.
That morning, i dreamt and saw myself singing at the pulpit Jamie Grace; Beautiful day. The congregation was singing with me and so was my sister. After a while, they stopped singing and I kept singing as i smiled and watched then take their seats.
Suddenly, began to feel someone coming towards me. I turned to my left and behold, was a very tall dark man. He smiled at me and I assumed that everyone else had seen Him walk towards me so I looked at the congregation but they seem not to have noticed this man at all. That amazed me. I looked back to the man and asked "who are you?"
"It is so sad that most people do not know hoe much I love them." He replied to me.
He kissed me on my left cheek twice and I felt that was God that had spoken to me! I felt like the most blessed person on earth! I felt soo grateful n thankful that He could come so close to me when i just committed sexual sin!
Weeks went by and I was standing strong. I avoided watching most movies, using most social networks, unfollowed people that posted or reposted inappropriate posts and yeah, i lived like i wanted to. Though i was not too close to God as I would have loved to, i knew I was living a sinless life.
I reunited with someone i had not seen for quite a while and he invited me to visit him. He had shown his interest on getting into a long-term relationship with him that may lead to marriage. Though my spirit wasn't willing, I felt i could give it a go. So i agreed to go out on a date with him. He was very nice and I had fun. We went to a park though, and there, he tried to touch my breasts. I firmly resisted this though I was quite in a shock. After this, i really did not want anything to do with him anymore.
He rang and apologised for his attempt and made it clear to me that he won't touch me like that again if i do not want to and asked for another day out.
During these times, i was sooo weak spiritually. I barely prayed from my heart. Only just uttered words of prayers that I did not really mean.
Anyway, we went out and I; me, I suggested we go to a park nearby... (All because i just loved this particular park) he liked the idea n eh, we did go.
After a long walk and talk, we decide to sit and chill. It was quite windy and cold.
I felt quite comfortable to get closer to him to get warm... and this time, i could not stop myself from having two love bites at the end of it all. At some points, while he caressed me, I was asking if what we were doing was right or wrong. I wasn't sure! He told me it didn't matter as long as we were going to be together.
Deep in my heart, I felt the urge to stop and walk away but nahh! I just could not help the sensational feeling. This was the first time a guy had touched me the way he did.
God so kind still, I was on my period and I just could not let him kiss me. That would have been my first kiss at 19 with a guy i did not really love.
My sister started to ring my phone after a while as i had been away from home for a while. She was worried and concerned of what was going on. She had feelings that i had sex with Him.
Anyways, her calls set us on our way back. I felt soooooo terrible, ashamed used and wasted when I got off that bench. I could not look at the face of d guy any more. I got angry and felt like throwing myself to the ground. Bt i thought of ways to comfort myself and started to pinch myself. As we walked out of the park tears rolled down my eyes in shame, regret n reproach. I could not blame the boy afterall, i let loose of my own dignity.
I managed to tell my sister what had happened and geezz! She encouraged me to an extent that I felt great about myself again.
I prayed that night like I had not done in a while and i was inspired to write a book. As I woke up, i wrote all i had seen and then thought to myself that my life must be going the way it is for a purpose. Maybe for you guys to learn from.
After two days, I started to think back to the incident and the park and the spirit came over me again. I started to masturbate... I had made a promise to God after the dream never to masturbate again but i just broke that promise. Like seriously?! What on earth was wrong with me?!
Few days after, there was a prayer meeting at our house and the pastor that came singled me out and prayed for me! He prayed all I needed him to pray; as if he knew my story. I was soo filled with the Holy Spirit that night.
I noticed that whenever i fell from grace, I got closer to God when I prayed. This was because at the times when i was 'free' i didn't spend as much time as I should have with God: reason why I fall for temptations that came my way.
Advice: whenever you get close to God, try hard not to slack but make the distance to Him even closer each day. How? Just a sincere prayer from deep in your heart morning and evening can keep you going.
I had broken a so-called promise I made to God and geez. I know what that could result to. Indeed, God is merciful. As I write now, I am hoping that I keep been strong to overcome the temptation whenever it comes again.
God still uses me, inspires me, helps me and supports me. Though I do not know what would happen to me in the future, I am sure God would give me the strength to go through.
One thing I forgot to add, at various points where prayed for help, I was led to various motivating and soul lifting/resurrecting verses. I kept record of all of these verses and my favourite was/is 2 Cor 12:7-10. Vs 9 says ' each time He told me, my grace is all you need. My power works beat in weaknesses. So now, I can boast in my weaknesses so that that the power of Christ can work through me".
This did not give me a licence to keep falling voluntarily to my weakness, but it gave me the power I needed when I fell after my souls has struggled and been defeated by my flesh.
God used those verses as my backbone spiritually.
Monday, 29 February 2016
MY STORY: MASTURBATION (part 2)
God had better plans for me.
Life without this boy was sort of a new life for me. With God's grace, I managed to get over the whole issue and focused on my life.
At various points in time, whenever i'd seen pictures or anything linking to sex, it stimulated me to masturbate. 1 out of 5 times, I managed to resist it but the other 4, it happens like I was not the person doing it.
I felt used and dumbed after every incident. I cried, prayed and begged God for mercy, grace and strength after each one.
There were times were I just wanted to give up and walk away from God but I knew i'd never find happiness outside Him. So I managed to move on with His grace and endless mercy.
At 18, I met a guy from college who was soo persuasive about us having sex together. This guy could talk sex the whole day if he had the chance to. Coincidently, we shared the same birthday, month and year. This made me feel that there was a purpose for our meeting each other.
Well, I felt wrong. All he wanted was to have sex with a 'Christian virgin girl'. (At least he made his intentions clear). As much as I really wanted to give it a try, I really wanted to please God too and I knew fore sure that God would definitely not be pleased if I did.
I tried talking to the guy about God but it seemed to create more room for him to talk dirty to me. I was not disturbed about this at the time and I just kept praying.
After a while, it began to seem like he was raising threats to beat me if i didn't do certain things. I prayed, told adults around me and I think I handled the issue well with God's grace and that was the end. The guy stopped bothering me. Guess what though?
The things he had said, the way he had said them came running through my mind. Day after day, night after night. I tried to wipe them off, but to no avail till one faithful night, I had fallen for my weakness again and this time, I had had enough! I just could not stop hitting myself on the wall and throwing myself to the ground.
I felt filthy and disgusted with the way I fell into temptations.
I got tired of asking for mercy.
The bible verse 'What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound? God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?' (Romans 6:1-2) kept ringing in my head.
I did not know what else to do. Deep in my heart, I still believed that God would forgive me. But I kept thinking of what could happen to my ministry, my future, my body, my spirit being, my blessings and many thoughts came rushing through my head.
Above all, the thought that God is merciful even though there may be consequences to my sin.
The thought that God can see my heart and He knows the desire I have to know Him.
The thought that His mercy is endless like the sea.
Those thoughts started to grow and I knelt down in pain, tears and a heart of full repentance and asked for mercy for the 100th time (not exactly)!
(To be continued.)
Thursday, 25 February 2016
MY STORY: MASTURBATION (part 1)
Hi, I am 20 yrs old.
I love God & I want to live for Him.
I want to make heaven and i am ready to face any persecution that I can for His sake.
However, there was a thorn that kept poking me and poured guilt on me.
Sometimes, I masturbated.
At a very young age of 5/8 a far relation of mine had started to touch and massage my immature breasts and fingered my tender private part.
When I grew up to realise at the age of 14, i prayed for God's vengeance upon him. He died of an unknown disease.
At the age of 15 or 16, he came to say goodbye to me in my dreams.
At the age of 17/18, I found out where it stated in the bible that :
"If anyone causes one of these little ones--those who believe in me--to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.' Matthew 18:6
Not trying to freak you out, but personally, i think that shows the power of God and how assertive He could be.
Now the story,...
Since i was 16, I was not too sure if masturbation was a sin or not. I asked pastors, n carried out my own researches which somewhat led to a better knowledge of masturbation.
After prayers, I figured out that it is a sin as you see or think about a sexual act before you start carrying it out.
Whenever I carried out this act, i felt devastated. I felt like the worst sinner on earth and most of the times, I just wanted to backslide.
At a certain time, before i turned 17, I was going to commit suicide as i had had enough of life. But then, God gave me reasons to live. Suicide would have led me to hell. But choosing life meant choosing an opportunity to change and be washed and renewed.
God sent someone apart from my family for me to love. This guy supported me and helped me get verrry close to God. The closest i have ever been to Him. We prayed together n he was very encouraging.
At this point, i had stopped masturbating and it barely came across my mind as I always was busy with God or my new friend.
I thought this boy was to stay forever but after much prayers, i guess it was not meant to be at the time.
(To be continued.)